Much ado about nothing

I am sitting here at work, eating my lunch, and I should really be finalizing the next phase of my big research project for school. I am just so not motivated however! Usually I am very driven, but there are times when my reaction is more like “ey”. So instead I am writing pretty much about nothing!

I think the whole adoption thing is getting to me. Deana has been fighting sadness for about two weeks and I have done my best to bring little sparks of sunshine into her cloudy days. However, I think the clouds are starting to affect me too! I am just so sad! Maybe it’s partly due to the fact that I backed up all of the video footage yesterday, and of course that meant I had to WATCH several of them! I want Zack and Sophie to come home!!!! They need their Mom and with her there are so many others who want to love them!

So, I need to add to my “To Do” list – Cheer up for Deana!

Also what is probably adding to my funk is that I like to make things happen. If something is not right, I am often the first to take care of the situation. Many of my friends have thanked me for getting them free lunches because I’ve articulated bad services, etc. However, in regards to the adoption I have NO POWER and that really makes me sad. I want to be able to DO something!

But I need to share that the agency Deana is using is awesome. They are really A+ and are doing the best they can. It’s hard to be patient when there are two lives involved.

Okay, didn’t I say this post would be about nothing? Too bad Seinfeld is off the air – maybe I could have been one of their writers…..

I really enjoy reading other people’s blogs as well. One of my favorites is written by a guy named Tony who I used to work with. Check it out at http://www.miwat.blogspot.com/ and let me know what you think.

Okay, well, I guess I should do my homework now. “Ey!”

Some misconceptions regarding Deana’s Adoption

You know, it has been eight months since Deana officially started the adoption process with Russia. Prior to that, she had done preliminary research and movements with an agency to adopt from Haiti. Yes, Haiti, where the majority of occupants are black. For reasons primarily due with the instability of the Haitian Government, she did not proceed.

I say this because I often hear some direct and inappropriate questions when I am talking about Deana’s adoption process. Here are a few of them!

Why Russia??? Is it because you want a white child? No, see above. But also I’d like to clarify something – Russia is a huge country and there are vast amounts of cultures and ethnic backgrounds that have melted into the population – just like America!!!! So while the two children Deana is adoption ARE white, there are children that are of Asian descent (hello, Russia is in EUROASIA), there are black children, there are children of Middle Eastern descent, etc. The assumption that people go to Russia for white children is very offensive.

Why Russia???? Why not China or other “needy” countries? Many think that Russia doesn’t have issues with overpopulated orphanages like China, the Ukraine, etc. That is just not true – the statistics are horrifying. Check out my earlier blog “Bible Thumpers Beware” for more references on this matter. Or maybe you can research the subject before you decide what the truth is.

How does Deana know that she can handle being a mother of TWO children all at once? Wow, how inspiring of you! How can ANYONE handle EVER being a parent for the first time? Why don’t people ask that of a first time pregnant woman with twins??? Why, because Deana has CHOSEN this course, do people feel okay asking this question??? But I digress. Let me state this – first of all, Deana is the 3rd of eight children. She was very involved in mothering and nurturing the last four, who were born between her 12th and 19th year of age. She is STILL actively a part of their lives. Furthermore, as a teacher and a human, she is very well gifted in child development and has the NATURAL ability to love and care for children (my own included). She addresses developmental issues (or natural phases) with a calm manner that is amazing for me to watch (yes, I assume that you would think I am an expert because I had three kids conventionally…..) She ALSO has years of education in child development. She has changed diapers, dealt with kids projecting throw up, teenagers rebelling…..the list goes on. I should say to you (if you are reading this and are horrified that you’ve asked this question) – it is NEVER polite to ask such a loaded, judgmental question!

How much is the adoption costing her? A lot, thank you very much! Now I have a few questions – How much do you make a year? How much did you pay for your house? How much credit card debt do you have? Do you tithe every week? ‘nuf said.

What if something is wrong with the kids, I mean, they could have bad attitudes or other issues? Okay, sorry for my sarcasm, but I have three kids and I never remember them handing me a guarantee card when they were born that, because they are my biological children, they will be perfect. Furthermore, Deana has done extensive screenings with professionals on the children – something that I did not do on my own children. Again, why is it okay to ask these questions just because she is adopting? Is it really so unusual that someone can love a child (or children), even if they are not perfect??? Further, GOD placed this burden on Deana’s heart! Chances are high that she will have to deal with issues in the future, as both will eventually be teenagers……..

Okay, I am a bit “rough” today so I will not post anymore. Thanks for reading and feel free to let me know if this post has gone too far.

Note: the above questions WERE asked by real people.

Nanny McStephanie Day 1 and other updates

Okay, day one with a full time nanny went VERY well! Kids got to school on time, they were picked up and Stephanie got all the info on both boys, homework was done and reviewed, and all I had to do when I got home was eat a delicious dinner and sign some forms for Kenny! Woohoo!

The boys also learned how to make their beds “the right way” and how to vacuum!!! Josh vacuumed his own room and, being the neat freak that he is, loved it. Kenny seemed to enjoy it too, but being a non-neat freak, the joy wasn’t as overwhelming. I AM pleased to announce that the new structure in Kenny’s life seems to be helping out and he appears to be back on track with the academics. I am praying that this continues.

Day 1 was a great success, all because of Nanny McStephanie!!!

I also came home to an official notice from the country regarding my dog that barks “during the hours of all the time”. This is an utter and complete lie. I am too tired right now to write the whole ordeal, but I DID confront my neighbor – very nicely, of course! I am tired of them being so unreasonable! These are the neighbors that called the police because we were having a pool party but it was Drew and the boys – the police said it was inappropriate and unreasonable that they called! They further complained that our pool equipment was too loud, that our air conditioner ran too much, etc. Do you see a pattern here? So anyway, I pretty much said “let’s be civilized adults here – come to us and we can try to work it out. No need to exaggerate about my dog to the county, etc.” I further confirmed with him that Tex was not barking all day long, that they have been happy the last week (maybe it helped that I told them I have a voice activated recorder substantiating the true activities of my dog’s behavior) and that Tex has not been barking all day long or all the time. So there you go. I was proud of myself for not losing my cool but believe me, I really wanted to tell him what I was thinking inside!!!! I think Deana was a little nervous about my interchange because she was waiting for me on the porch with a worried look! (I might have been more effective if I hadn’t already been in my PJ’s, which I put on as soon as I get home!!!!! Hey, aren’t Penguin Pants intimidating????)

I seem to be in a weird place since dropping my Speech class – still in limbo regarding Russia, but the extra hours to do my other homework and the fact I will be home tonight still feels strange. But it’s a good strange so there you go!

Have a wonderful day! If you have a chance, please pray that Deana hears today about her court date so she can get Zack and Sophie. Each day she seems a little more sad and it’s breaking my heart. I wish I could take away the pain but I really have no power as only her children will do it. But I try to at least give her small moments of happiness in the midst of the cloud over her head.

Ciao!

Oh yeah, and I forgot to introduce……

Nanny McStephanie!!!!This is Stephanie, Deana’s youngest sister. She has been helping me by watching the boys beginning February 1st. But starting tomorrow, she will be my full time nanny!!!! She will also be the nanny for Zack and Sophie when they come home from Russia.
She does so much already – she takes the boys to school, picks them up, makes sure homework is done, teaches the boys chores (like Kenny how to do his laundry!), and has even cooked dinner for us (and it was yummy!). She has been a huge blessing for sure!
But even better than that, she is an awesome friend and sister. She is SOOOOO funny, has one liners you wouldn’t believe, sings great in Sing Star (she and I are the best!), and cries at the drop of a hat. She is very kind hearted and loving. I am so happy that she will be around more often for me to love.
Welcome Stephanie! (We’re bringing sexy back!)

I am not sure what to type….

….but I have this urge to write something! It’s not that anything profound has happened to me today or that there is something especially irritating I want to expound on. It’s more like there is this urge to be heard. Well, isn’t that the lamest thing you’ve every heard?

I really hope I’m not a narcissist!!!

On the school front: things are going well. I have caught up or moved ahead of schedule with all of my classes. Due to timing constraints and the impending Russia trip, I had to drop my speech class. But that’s cool – I can still graduate in December I am sure.

I also got some projects done today!

  • I copied Deana’s DVD and labeled them so that she can give them out to some of her friends. Hopefully it will work out for her.
  • I was able to back-up a tons of pics on the PC, something that hasn’t been done for over six months.
  • I got to catch up on some of my friend’s blogs.
  • I even installed the Collapse game that Deana gave me for Christmas! Woohoo!

You know, having a holiday is pretty darn awesome!!!!

I hope you are doing well!

Random Thoughts……

Just thought I’d jot down some random thoughts…..

Set one – Gina’s experience driving home from work in Southern California:

  • When you’re in stop-and-go traffic and your lane is merging, following merging ediquette – EVERY OTHER CAR.
  • When you’re in stop-and-go traffic and you’re waiting to merge, it’s not the best time to pick your nose.
  • When you’re in stop-and-go traffic and you take the risk of picking your nose, it is especially important not to eat it!

Set two – loving your neighbor:

  • When your neighbor asks that you turn off your pool pump because it’s too loud (which it really isn’t) smile and show love. (but don’t turn off the pump).
  • When your neighbor asks you to not take your dog out before 8am on the weekends, smile and show love (but take him out if he needs to go potty because, seriously, he isn’t barking or anything).
  • When your neighbor comes to your door in the middle of dinner to state that your dog barks “non-stop” all day when you know that’s a freaking lie and they stand at the fence making noises at your dog to prevoke him…..send Deana to the door before you cause a block riot.

Set three – learning how to behave appropriately:

  • When Deana is testing your six-year-old son on random spelling words and comes up with “car” followed by “cart”, do NOT ask him to spell “far”.
  • Do not, under any circumstances, make up a teasing name for your 11-year-old son because he just might say your name phonetically correct. (thanks for teaching him that, D)
  • When your youngest son makes you a Valentine’s Day card and writes “I mith you” and reads it phonetically, do NOT correct him (it was so cute).

Thanks for reading……

Valentine’s Day 2007

First of all, I was surprised to find out that people actually read this blog! So, thanks to those who have sent encouragement and kind words……..

Okay, for those of you who have followed this blog since its inception, you know Valentine’s Day is not one of my favorite days. In fact, I have been accused of having a pretty bad attitude when the day rolls around! But I can tell this year is going to be different, and here’s why:

On Sunday, I stayed home from church in order to get ahead in my school work, including a huge research project that just started for my Biola program. I was knee deep in research, paperwork, etc. when the front door opened. In walked Josh holding the biggest Lady Bug balloon I have ever seen! (Lady Bugs are my fav.) He says, “Happy Valentine’s Day Mom! I love you! This is for you because you bug!”

He then pulls out a stuffed monkey and says, “Here Mom, I love you more. Here’s a monkey because you monkey around so much.” (The ultimate compliment!)

In walks Kenny, holding beautiful tulips, and says, “Happy Valentine’s Mom. I bought this for you because you smell so nice…..at least most of the time!”

Please note, these comments are NOT mean! Anyone who knows me knows my weird humor and it warmed my heart that my boys love me enough to be like me! LOL (On a side note, the whole “you bug” comment was derived by Kirstie years ago and I’ve always held it close to my heart!).

So, thanks boys – thanks for warming my heart and making me smile!!!!