Fighting for “Life”

Life is precious, and this year when Roe v Wade was overturned by the Supreme Court, many people celebrated. The crux of the celebration for many was the protection of life. Sounds pretty legit. We all are here today because our lives survived our mother’s womb, and once born we were raised, fed, hopefully loved and cherished…….but no matter how we were treated after being born, we all can say without hesitation we have life today. In that regard, I think we can agree it worked out for us!

A close family member was pretty stoked, too. Their FaceBook timeline was full of memes to emphasize how this was the right thing to do as life is precious. I don’t begrudge their position or views really – that is their right – but I have to admit…….it confused me a little. On one hand, this person walked the walk in the “precious life” arena. I mean, when they married their first wife, this person accepted four children as his own, loved them, provided for them, called them sons and daughter, and for some even gave them his last name. Despite having no genetic connection to these children, he stepped up and loved them, showing without any fanfair that he celebrated the fact that they were ALIVE! That their lives were precious. When this person had two biological kids of his own, he raised them not with words of “half brother” or “half sister”, but emphasized the family unit being whole. I always admired that. After all, these kids did nothing to deserve being rejected or accepted, and to really appreciate the gift of life, one must extend love to the gifts of God, right? That message has been shared by many of my friends and family since Roe v Wade was overturned, and it does have some teeth to it.

This is where my confusion starts. You see, the same person who accepted 4 children into his heart, who raised them as his own, who treated them the same as his two bio kids, and who also celebrated the overturning of Roe v Wade under the guise of “protecting life” and “protecting the innocent”, has acted differently when the situation was slightly different, and I surmise feels justified in doing so. You see, over 15 years ago Deana and I adopted two siblings from Russia. These two beautiful, innocent children would have had a very high chance of dying by drugs or violence before their 18th birthdays had they not been adopted. If they beat the odds and passed their 18th birthday, they certainly faced an uphill struggle to survive as (at least at the time) their birth certificates would have clearly been flagged as orphans (the document is used in hiring) and due to the judgment of most citizens at that time, would be viewed as undesirables. By adopting them, Deana and I literally saved their lives. We celebrate their precious lives everyday and also acknowledge how their lives have blessed us beyond words.

These two children did nothing to deserve being flagged as undesirables. They did nothing to deserve being put into an orphanage. They were innocent, and despite their circumstances, their mother at least loved them enough to give birth to them instead of aborting them. Bottom line, they are precious and we’re worth protecting, as much as or perhaps more than the babies this person and others are screaming to protect.

However, this same family member who showed so much love and compassion for his 4 step-children has never met our Russian children in the 15+ years they’ve been in our lives. Why? The stated reason is “they are not family”. The underlying reason is more like this……”Gina, you and Deana are lesbians.”

This man who loved so much now directs his life around religious dogma that would turn his back on two innocent children who did nothing to him or anyone else, two precious and innocent lives, because of his disgust for their parents. This man would argue that only “family” deserves to be interacted with, while also saying “save the babies” that he will never meet and also interacting with people and children ALL THE TIME that are “not family”. He would disregard two innocent lives and treat these children as lepers because the parents that adopted them (to which they didn’t even have a choice) love them and care for them, but are also lesbians.

Yes, you go on “fighting for life” and “celebrating life” and the overturning of Roe v Wade, but know your hypocricy and lack of love is seen by more than the person typing these words. Every few years, my now adult Russian children ask why they’ve never met you. When they were little, I’d make excuses and then share funny stories about how great you were or something fun that happened in my youth. But now that they’re older and see the duplicity of so many things in the world, I admit that somewhere on your journey of faith, your heart was somehow changed and you no longer have the capacity to love anyone you deem tarnished or outside your religious belief system, including your own daughter. I know you also insist that you DO love me, but…….. I am not sharing this to belittle you, or to slander you, but to emphasize that life IS precious, and that should be enough. My Russian children are just as important and worthy of love or at least acknowledged as much as some random fetus. But too many times, as is the case with you, there are supposed justified caveats to this, which really translates to “only lives I approve of matter”. And that is a shame, because your Bible clearly states that Jesus loves us all, and more importantly, that love is not just “praying for their souls”, but having a meaningful relationship with them without judgment. You know, like Jesus hanging out with prostitutes, tax collectors, and sinners.

If this is your Christianity, I have to say, YOU are the one that’s been indoctrinated.

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