So I missed the first ten minutes……sigh……Curse you Central Time!  Oh, and for my “friend” who deleted me from FB, funny that you still come to this page!

Michael – I missed his song, but I bet it sounded great!

Didi Benami (02) – I really REALLY liked her song!  She sounded on key to me and had a depth to her song.  Cheers for this.

Casey James (03) – at first I was like, this song is too big for him.  But when he went full voice, I was like…..Yeah, sing it brother!  I love the blues feel to it and his hair looks MUCH better down than in a pony tail!  🙂  Slide guitar wasn’t that bad, either.  Can I add that Ellen is HILARIOUS?

Lacey Brown (04) – so she is a church girl, huh?  That’s kinda cool, actually!  She has that hip hair AND can be a Christian, you know?  Anyway, her singing didn’t impress me nearly as much as her story and the way she looks.  She sounded……scared.  But I think she has potential…..though she may have tried a bit too hard……

Andrew Garcia (05) – no guitar tonight man?  But boy, do I love this man’s voice!  Nice use of the voice – soft one moment, rough and full the next.  The song itself…..not so much…..but I liked him very much.

Katie Stevens (06) – the story of her Grandma and her love for her touched me during the audition phase of this season.  Her voice, especially for her age, impresses me.  I think she did “okay” tonight….I liked her voice, but I am not sure I would sit and listen again.  Maybe it was the song, I don’t know.

Tim Urban (07) – a raggae version of “Under my Thumb?”  Seriously?  NOT…..A……FAN.  Oh, and the singing?  SUCKED.  Sorry.  Rediculous.

Siobhan Magnus (08) – word of advice from a woman with a big nose like myself – not a good idea to put a piercing to emphasize!  I have to admit, though, her voice was pretty good.  Much better at the higher notes.  A few pitch problems.  Oh wait, I was gonna say something nice, but that screaming at the end scared the crap out of me.  What the hell was THAT about?!?!!?!

Lee DeWyze (09) – I will be straight with you, this guy is not my fav.  I see him, and I start by not liking him.  He has a steep road to climb to impress me.  But I have to tell you – I loved his song!  His raspy voice was……NICE!  He seemed so  WITH the song, comfortable, and I really enjoyed listening to him!  This was the first song I really thought “I need to vote for him” tonight!

Paige Miles (10) – another church girl – right on!  I don’t have strong feelings for Paige, but I have to say, I love that she always sings songs that don’t necessarily fit the stereotype for a young black woman.  And this song seemed so effortless for her.  And dang it girl, she was in tune for the whole song and dammit, I think I will buy her freaking iTune song for that performance!  What?!!?!!?  She was struggling with her voice this week?  NO WAY!  Amazing.  She gets my vote for SURE!

Aaron Kelly (11) – again, sorry, I can’t get past his eyebrows.  When he was younger, they looked FINE!  His hair looked cool tonight, though.  And I resent this, but I can’t say one bad thing about his singing tonight, either.  He even sounded…….gulp…….GOOD.  I agree with Randy, those “tender moments” were very good.  And, have I mentioned that ELLEN IS HILARIOUS?

Crystal Bowersox (12) – Another transparent moment – I love her.  She is one of my favs, if not my very favorite.  Her voice is so…..timeless.  She could be in the 60’s a la Janice Joplin.  She can be in the 90’s a la Melissa Ethridge.  I could sit for hours and just listen to her.  She is naturally talented and so entertaining.  HER VOICE IS AMAZING.  Freak.  I think I want her to win, seriously.  VOTE FOR HER WOULDYA?  Oh, and she made the song her own, you know?  I love her.

So, often in my life I am faced with situations that are not……well……pleasant.  Either I am confronted by my own bad behavior, or that of others, or just circumstances that are tough.  Everyone deals with these sorts of things, for sure.  But, it’s how we REACT to it that makes us different.

For example, one of my former co-workers lost her 18-year-old daughter in a tragic, really pathetic car accident.  My co-worker and her husband were obviously devastated, which is completely understandable, yet they kept a peace about them and often encouraged those around them that were also dealing with the pain of the situation.  As Christians, they pointed their responses to their Lord.  Years later, I am still amazed by their reaction.

On the other side of the spectrum, there are those that justify their bad behavior over and over again.  They are not emotionally mature enough to confront situations, but instead keep perceived hurts to themselves, avoiding or hurting the offender with passive-aggressive behaviors or outright rudeness.  I often find that there are whole clans that reinforce this behavior by either ignoring it or outright enabling it by offering excuses or statements like, “well, that’s the way she is.  You know we {enter name here} just don’t know how to communicate”.  All the while, their tacit acceptance of the behavior gives it credence.

I have been through the spectrum myself.  I have been very proud of the way I’ve reacted to situations, and very disappointed in myself.  I suppose I’d be pretty good at offering excuses when I’ve experienced an epic fail…….even as I look at others and point out that their excuses are lame.  So, as I encourage my 2.78 readers to consider their reactions this week, it also is a reminder to me……..our reactions are huge areas we are measured by.  The things that bug us the most might be characteristics that manifest themselves often in our own lives.  Patterns exist.  Think about it.

Lee Dewyze – okay, I love the song he sang.  I listen to it almost everyday on the radio.  And my reaction?  He screwed up a song I love.  There, I said it.  Dude, you sucked.  Sorry.  Although, apparently, the AI Judges see things differently.  😦

Alex Lambert – excuse me, do I need to clean out my ears?  So far, both boys so far seem to be singing in the key of y.  Sorry Alex, maybe I’m still irritated with Lee, but I didn’t like your song AT ALL.

Tim Urban – first, what is the deal with your hair?  But, your guitar playing is good.  And wow, you are singing IN KEY!  I actually liked what you did with the song…..a bit different.  You get a thumbs up.  But I didn’t have a David Cook moment…..sorry.

Andrew Garcia (5704) – he has been high on my like list so far this season.  He has his own style.  Wow, Genie in a Bottle?  He looks so RELAXED!  He sounded SO GOOD!  His stylings are his own!  I have nothing to say other then I loved it!  But, of course, the judges just didn’t see it.  I have no idea what they’re seeing tonight.

Casey James (5705) – okay, he’s cute.  I give him that.  I was not sure about his song choice – Keith Urban is a fav and well, has big shoes to fill.  But I have to say, even though he had a few pitch issues, I think he did a pretty good job – especially with tonight’s fair.  He has a nice, natural voice.  But, alas, he hair was bugging me.

Aaron Kelly – I have to get this off my chest…..his eyebrows bug me to no end.  But beyond that, it would have been nice if just ONE NOTE was not in the wrong key!  If I had the remote, I would have muted that sucker!  I expect the judges to have loved him……

Todrick Hall – GREAT start to a classic song!  Then, as the lights turn on and the background singers get projected on the big screen behind him, I have no idea what the hell came out of his mouth!  There were admitedly some good parts in this song, for sure, but many that were BAD.  I don’t know how to process that.

Michael Lynche (5708) – “Big Mike” and a high voice…..hmmmmm……but it was soothing to my ears.  His suit was a nice touch.  I really didn’t resonate with the song he sang, but his voice was nice.  And he has a nice stage presence.  That mike looked tiny in his hands!  Wow, and the judges saw it too!  Are the planets aligning??????

Notice the names with the numbers – if you are reading this within 2 hours of the end of your broadcast, I’d appreciate it if you’d vote for them.  🙂  Because I have a problem – my cell phone is a California number and in PST.  But I am living in CST, two hours later.  So, AI won’t accept my vote after I watch the show and I am NOT staying up until 11pm to vote!  So, help a girl out!

So I started a new season, dropped off of it due to the home situation, but am back watching it again.  I have to say there were some good performances (so far) that I’ve seen.  But I started this post to say, Crystal Bowersox (text 5707!) (despite her bad teeth) is the most amazingly talented young woman I’ve seen in a long time!  I mean, her voice is great.  Her stage presence is great.  Even her guitar playing was pretty darn good!  Even though I really like the 17-year-old whose grandma has alheimerz, I think Crystal may be my pick for the season…..at least for the women!  But I reserve the right to change my mind since it IS pretty early in the season.

Who is your favorite?  What do you think?

Wow, I can’t believe this night is really here!  I LOVE this time of year!  I wish I was able to have a more formal affair tonight, but as I am in the middle of ANOTHER move (the last for AT LEAST a year, thank you very much!), I am just thankful that I have a warm room, cable TV, and this laptop to enjoy this year’s festive event!  Bring on the awards!

So I have to admit a few things……I am not passionately rooting for too many winners as I have in previous years.  Last year I was CERTAIN that Kate Winslet was to win, and was SO SO excited when she did!  I jumped up and it was cool becasue Deana and I were at an Academy Award party too!  Whoot!  The other big confession is that I did NOT see Avatar.  Sigh.  I just couldn’t do it but will once it’s on DVD…..sorry for those of you who think I’m just horrible!

But, I DO have a couple nominees I AM rooting for……..I think Mo’nique deserves the award for Best Supporting Actress.  Her performance in Precious was amazing, really.  I forgot who she was.  She gets my knod.  And for Best Actress, I fully admit that she probably won’t win, but I really wish Carey Mulligan (from An Education) wins.  She was convincing to me and didn’t seem to be acting at all.  However, if Sandra Bullock wins, I would be pleased, too.

I think George Clooney will get best actor, Christoph W. best supporting actor, Precious for pic, Kathryn R for best director, James Cameron for best director, and Up for best animated film.  Saw no docs or foreign films, so can’t go there.

We shall see how it goes!

1.  He said the United States was not a Christian Nation.  Well, actually, he said it is not a Christian, Jewish, or Muslim nation.  To actually quote him, he said, “One of the great strengths of the United States is … we have a very large Christian population — we do not consider ourselves a Christian nation or a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values.”  Damn him, how will we bend the constitution to our Judeo-Christian beliefs?  I mean seriously, I want this country to be like those run by the Taliban or by theocracies where they kill people for having sex outside of marriage.  Or maybe be more like England first under Queen Mary (aka, “Bloody Mary”) and kill all those pesky protestants……or before her when King Henry was trying to get his freak on and therefore split from the Catholic church and basically killing anyone who disagreed with his decision……..so you can take your Bill of Rights Article 1, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereofor abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.” and remind the President he better damn well not speak up about this EVER as free speech is NOT allowed him – OR ELSE!

2.  “President Barack Obama requested that the Congress repeal the [don’t ask, don’t tell] law and directed Gates to consider how best to implement a repeal.”  How DARE you request that citizens of this United Stated of America be treated equally!  How DARE you even THINK that those homosexuals have the right to be HONEST and OPEN about who they are!  I mean seriously, let them lie about who they are when they are dying to defend you and me.  As long as we don’t know they are gay, then they are a-okay!

3.  Hello, you may not have noticed this, but Barack is NOT WHITE!  Doesn’t he know that this is AMERICA and that means you have to be WHITE to RULE?!?!!?!  Let’s look back on GW Bush – HE, a good ol’ boy, helped our country by taking our deficit to the highest point in generations.  HE started the $700billion bail out plan!  Now THAT is leadership!  And THAT is AMERICAN!

4.  The whole health care mess.  I mean people, the insurance agencies know how to run things – why does Obama want to go and change it?  I mean seriously – my insurance won’t cover my kid’s immunizations and I am paying $500+ a month for coverage.  THAT is the American way people – shove that whole “change” idea!  Let the health insurance companies keep their monopoly exemption!

5.  Remember that Christmas Day terrorist attempt where the guy tried to blow up the airplane?  How DARE Obama say our lives are safe under his watch!  He is WEAK in this area because, hey, that man almost succeeded!  He should be ASHAMED that he allowed that to happen!  Because, Lord knows, Americans never have been attacked on our own soil, right President Bush?  YOU would never let that happen…….

Taken from http://wsr.byu.edu/content/warning-signs-emotional-abuse – my comments in parathesis

Emotional abuse is characterized by the abuser’s manipulation and invalidation of his or her partner. Here is a list of warning signs to be aware of.

Abusive Expectations

• Makes unreasonable demands
• Requires constant attention, or that you spend all your free time with him/her.
• Constantly criticizes.
• No matter how much you give, it never seems to be enough. (and don’t expect a Christmas present, either)

Aggressing

• Calls you names, accuses, blames, threatens, or gives orders.
• Can be disguised as “helping” or “teaching.”
• Judgmental “I know best” attitude. (and no one else knows anything and is the problem)

Constant Chaos

• Deliberately starts arguments and may be in constant conflict with you or with others
• Treats you well in front of others, but changes into a different person when you’re alone together, or vice versa.
• May enjoy “drama,” because it creates excitement and brings the focus back onto him/herself.

Denying

• Denies your personal needs, especially when that need is greatest, and does so with the intent of hurting, punishing, or humiliating you.  (Ask yourself, when you just got home from being at work 12 hours and your spouse has been home for 4 hours while your mom has watched the children- should you have to make dinner and cater to him?)
• Denies that certain events occurred or that certain things were said.
• Refuses to listen or communicate (silent treatment), and withdraws emotionally. (especially with family members)
  
• Denies your perceptions, memory, and sanity.
• Disallows or overrules any viewpoints, perceptions, or feelings that differ from his/her own.
• Causes you to lose confidence in and question your own perceptions and feelings.
• Causes you to doubt your most powerful survival tool: your own mind.

Dominating

• Manipulates the relationship so that the only feelings and opinions that count are his/her own.
• Must have his/her own way, and will hurt your feelings if necessary in order to get it.
• Holds you personally responsible for his/her own happiness.
• Disregards your personal standards or beliefs, and may try to persuade you to do things that you don’t want to do.

Emotional Blackmail

• Plays on your fear, guilt, compassion, religious values, or other “hot buttons” to get what he/she wants.
• May threaten to end the relationship, totally reject or abandon you, give you the “cold shoulder,” or use other tactics to control you.

Invalidation

• Seeks to distort your perceptions of your own world.
• Refuses to or fails to acknowledge reality in order to create his/her own false reality.
• If you tell your partner that you felt hurt by something he/she did or said, he/she might say, “You’re too sensitive. That shouldn’t hurt you.”
• Or, the abuser might turn it around by saying, “You hurt me too sometimes. I just don’t say anything because I’m understanding.”
• Suggests that your emotions and perceptions are faulty and can’t be trusted.
• Any time your own feelings are disregarded or denied, invalidation has occurred.

Minimizing

• Less extreme form of denial.
• Says things like “You’re exaggerating” or “You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”
• Trivializes by suggesting that something you have communicated is inconsequential or unimportant.

Unpredictable Responses

• Acts angry or upset in a situation that normally would not warrant such a response, or gets angry certain times but not others.
• Blows up or gets angry at you over innocent comments you made.
• You feel like you have to “walk on eggshells” around him/her.
• Has drastic mood changes or sudden emotional outbursts.
• Likes something you do one day, but hates it the next.

Verbal Assaults

• Berates, belittles, criticizes, threatens, or calls you names.
• Subtle to blatant use of sarcasm and humiliation.
• Constantly finds flaws with you.
• Makes fun of you in front of others, or in private.

….I know, weird for ME not to write a whole blog complaining about something!  Some miracles do still exist in this day and age!

Let me just say that God takes better care of me than I could even request.  He knows what I need better than I do.  He MEETS those needs more powerfully than if I were to take all my efforts, combine them into one powerful force, and throw it at anything.  He puts into place things more perfectly than my best laid plans, not only addressing the most pressing need, but establishing long term success.  And for that, I am utterly amazed.  And blessed.  And humbled.  And rejoice.

And, therefore, cannot express a complaint even if I wanted to!