Dare I even suggest ASSUMPTIONS?
We, as humans, are very complicated creatures. People like me tend to read signs or communicate in indirect ways. This leads to assumptions and that is OFTEN not a good thing!
Some examples I am learning from – if someone does something that upsets me, it is better to share that with the person because they may not even be TRYING to send a message, or might even be shocked to know their actions hurt me! However, if they WERE sending a message, the issue can be addressed and maybe even resolved! Otherwise, you end up being hurt, they are oblivious and/or the issue is not really addressed, and resentment builds. Never good.
I have also learned in the last few days that people can send mixed messages rather easily. Like they can share a portion of the truth, but their ACTIONS create a signal or tell you that they are moving toward something when they are NOT. In moments like this, I have learned it is better to be direct, ask straight out, and then know what the truth is. Try not to read their ACTIONS and put too much weight on them because you could be way off! I always say actions speak louder than words, and at times that is very true, but sometimes people send the wrong signals through their actions……
Also, don’t assume moods or messages in MySpace or other forums are about YOU! They might be, but what if they have NOTHING to do with you? You could be feeling pressure, pain, or other negative emotions that are a waste of time……..
I can be very direct, but I DO have a problem sharing when my feelings are hurt or I think my truth will cause rejection or anger……so I am working on that. And I hope me sharing my experiences with the above help at least one of you!