Yesterday I shared about how God blessed me through my son, Kenny. Well, I am going to try to focus on the other blessings God has put into my life instead of seeing things like I usually do…..like dwelling on the things that are painful or unfair or wrong in my life.
So, let’s begin, in no particular order:
- The sun is BEAUTIFUL this morning. It is as if God put it there just for me to feel His warmth and love.
- Sitting here with my coffee, writing this blog, surrounded by my family, I am so content.
- Am I sad? Yes, aspects of me are sad. But they are normal and they are real and I do not need to be afraid to admit it anymore.
- My kids are wonderful. My ex-husband is wonderful. My ex-in-laws are wonderful. I am not sure how these latter two changed to dramatically, but I appreciate them in my life. UPDATE: this comment/bullet point has NOTHING to do with anyone else besides me. I am seeing them for who they are, who they always have been, and it does not relate to anyone else but them. And these are not people who have an agenda against me or anyone else.
- My friends are there for me, not just for emotional support, but they appreciate me for who I am – the good, the bad, and the ugly – and love me completely. True friends love, even when you share with them your failures. I am blessed with several who fit this mark. And they also tell me the tough stuff out of love. My friends are amazing.
- My Dad and Ellie are wonderful. Tough times exist, but true family fits back into the “right” place as if nothing has changed. They hug you, they listen, they support, and they love. And I have that, and I am truly blessed by it.
- Again, my kids are an elixir I just can’t stop thinking about. The happiness that shows in their eyes, the feel of their hugs or just witnessing their silliness…..I am blessed.
- UPDATE: outside circumstances hurt me, outside attacks taint me, and outside words attempt to crucify my spirit (even if cloaked under the premise of love). And some filter through and hit my core, this is true. But they cannot diminish the blessings that surround me. These aspects can keep trying to tear me down while claiming their devotion to me, and I CANNOT CONTROL THAT, but hear me – believe me…….THEY DO NOT CONTROL ME. I am prepared to lose everything I hold dear (especially how others view my character), and yet I will remain blessed. And, for that, I am at peace.
I am a bit sad today. As I said, that’s okay. But I am blessed, and these blessings are not contrived. They are not there to “force” me to be happy. As my good friend Martin reminds me, “Truth is truth.” And, he’s right!